Delivering immeasurable volumes of snark about movies and anything else that pops into my head
Showing posts with label Bette Midler. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Bette Midler. Show all posts
Tuesday, December 25, 2012
Review: "Parental Guidance"
Warm and schmaltzy, “Parental Guidance” is the movie equivalent of comfort food. It’s funny and warm-hearted, not terribly ambitious, but it does the things it sets out to do well.
Billy Crystal and Bette Midler star as young-ish grandparents struggling to reconnect with their grandkids while watching over them for a week. They’re a winning onscreen match, trading a few snipes but with strong base of love and affection underneath. It seemed like just yesterday Crystal was a romantic leading man, and now he’s riffing as a Borsch Belt grandpa. Time goes by.
I don’t mind saying that seeing Crystal and Midler back on the screen in starring roles warms the cockles of my frigid critic’s heart. They both made nice careers out of their engaging comedic personalities, and it was mysterious why they both seemed to fall off Hollywood’s map a decade ago. Crystal’s mostly been doing voice work, and Midler has popped up in occasional bit roles in movies few people saw.
“Parental Guidance” mostly acts as a showcase for the duo’s funny-bone charms, and a splendid one at that. At times director Andy Fickman and screenwriters Lisa Addario and Joe Syracuse wade too deep into sappy life-lessons moments. But the laughs are good and plentiful.
Artie Decker (Crystal) is a baseball radio announcer who always dreamed of making it to the bigs calling Giants games, but never made it higher than “De Voice” of the Fresno Triple-A Grizzlies. His wife Diane (Midler) was a TV weather girl back when they were still called that, and has loyally stuck by Artie’s side through countless career moves.
(As is S.O.P. in a Hollywood flick, they own a huge, gorgeous house that should be way beyond the means of a pair of minor-league broadcasters.)
Then they get a surprise call from their only child, Alice (Marisa Tomei), asking them to come to Atlanta to watch over their three kids. It seems Alice’s husband Phil (Tom Everett Scott) has won a big award for his automated home design, and wants to use the occasion as a much-needed vacation for the harried parents.
The trouble is, Alice and Phil have a new Age-y approach to parenting that the Deckers don’t exactly embrace – no sugar, no punishment, etc. The oldsters also can’t figure out the newfangled house, controlled by a computer that sounds like a female version of HAL 9000.
On top of that, Artie is stressed about just getting canned for not being up on social media. “Apps? I have no apps!” he insists indignantly, as if he’s been accused of carrying a disease.
The three young actors are winsome as all get out, and talented little performers to boot. The filmmakers grant them fairly typical kid problem: Harper (Bailee Madison) is a precocious violinist who needs more freedom to grow; Turner (Joshua Rush) has a stutter and is being bullied at school; Barker (Kyle Harrison Brietkopf) is a scallywag tyke with a bloom of unruly red curls and an even wilder imagination.
The interaction between grandkids and grandparents is fun and kooky. Artie gives Barker payoffs for good behavior – 6-year-olds are pretty cheap to bribe – and indulges Turner’s desire to watch the “Saw” horror movies together, resulting in the movie’s biggest laugh line. And Diane helps Harper find her inner teen.
Yes, “Parental Guidance” is pretty forgettable wholesome entertainment. But this is an amiable family-friendly comedy with an impish streak – a bear hug coupled with a few head noogies.
3 stars out of four
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Review: "Cats & Dogs: The Revenge of Kitty Galore"

It has been nine years since "Cats & Dogs" first exposed us to a secret underground war fought between talking canines and felines, with super-spy agents facing off with James Bond-esque gadgetry.
Now we have a sequel, of sorts, which has improved the sleekness of the computer-generated antics, but not the bone-headed approach to making kiddie flicks.
As near as I can determine, nobody involved with the first movie had anything to do with this one, other than Sean Hayes, Michael Clarke Duncan and a couple others reprising small roles voicing critters -- essentially, they're vocal walk-ons. Even the humans have been swapped out.
By the title, "Cats & Dogs: The Revenge of Kitty Galore," we might be led to believe that a dastardly arch-villain has returned to wreak more havoc. But no, Kitty Galore is a new creation, a hairless cat voiced by Bette Midler, and with an origin story that's an homage/rip-off of the Joker's.
Kitty wants to broadcast "The Call of the Wild," a nefarious high-pitched recording that will drive all the world's dogs mad, thus estranging them from their human companions, and leaving cats free to take over as, er, top dogs.
Nick Nolte provides the voice of Butch, the veteran dog agent (voiced by Alec Baldwin last time around) forced to partner up with Diggs (James Marsden), an accident-prone police dog recently recruited into the doggie agency. They've got fancy comm links in their dog houses, collars hiding lasers and lockpicks, and subterranean rocket transit tubes for high-speed travel to Dog World Headquarters.
Turns out the cats have their own spy outfit, Mousers Ensuring Our World's Safety (I'll let you figure it out), and Catherine (Christina Applegate) is their top agent. After briefly tangling with Diggs and Butch, she decides to join paws to foil Kitty's evil plot.
Tagging along is Seamus (Katt Williams), a dodo-headed dove who turns out to be an unwitting stool pigeon, but mostly is one jive-talking turkey.
There's a few occasional inspired moments. I liked the trapped room slowly filling with kitty litter. And a houseful of catnip-tripping kittens. And there's a cookie after the end credits worth sticking around for.
But this is low-wattage entertainment aimed at very small children -- kindergartners would likely grow impatient with it. It's an unimaginative collection of shiny things, cute critters and goofy action meant to distract tykes for 82 minutes.
Call me catty, but I think we can do better by our kids, and our pets.
The 3-D effects are decent, but not worth the ticket upgrade. Though "Coyote Falls," a new Road Runner cartoon preceding the movie, is a nostalgic treat.
1.5 stars out of four
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